So, guess what I am? I believe the technical term for this feeling would be, "Blah."
I'm just feeling down lately for a number of reasons.
Restaurants hate me. I never get to go to them. I love them dearly, but they apparently have some sort of force field that keeps me away. About this fact, I am greatly displeased.
Yesterday, plans to go out to eat with friends got nixed which ticked me off more than I realized. So I hit the phone and called a bunch of friends trying to find someone I could meet up with for a change of lunch plans. Everyone was either sick, busy or at work.
So I told dh we'd go out for dinner. He was fine with that (which is odd because he hates going out to eat), but then that got nixed because my kids headed for Pestville at warpspeed and I refuse to reward bad behavior with a trip to any place that they adore. So yet another chance at going out was nixed. Can't you just see some little old man smacking my hand away screeching, "No restaurant for YOUUUUUU?"
I wanted Starbucks tonight after the Nutless Wonder's training class which is conveniently right across from a Starbucks, but that didn't happen for a number of reasons. My fault because I didn't say I wanted it, but I'm getting annoyed with dh's ability to get huffy lately. I didn't want to deal with the passive aggressive sighing, so I didn't say anything.
I adore Starbucks. Anyone who knows anything about me knows I love my iced coffee drinks with a frightening passion. So any time one is within 100 or so feet of a Starbucks, one should know to ask. One should make absolutely certain he/she offers me coffee when it is just hours before my birthday, there is a Starbucks right there and one is well aware that not only is said Starbucks within reach, but it can actually be on the way home if you just make one simple left turn. But, alas, no Starbucks.
I'm sensing this is going to be yet another in a LONG line of sucky birthdays. Last year, for the first time in a long time, I actually had a good day. The previous year had been a tough one, so I threw myself a birthday party. I needed it. I had a blast. This year, no party and no definite plans for anything. Every year, I hope for something, but that never happens.
Grrrrr. I love my birthday. I just hate that it gets screwed up year after year. There's so much potential, but it usually gets squashed.
Let's see how many people forget it completely. Let's see how many people stumble across this entry and say, "Oh shit! It was her birthday?"
Screw this. I'm going to bed.
In the eternal words of Eric Cartman: "Screw you guys. I'm going home." That and, "Mooooom. Kitty's being a dildo," but that last one really has nothing to do with this entry. Except, maybe that last word.
FTR, after about 12:30 pm tomorrow, I'll be home. If you have any clue where I live and you're in my metro area, feel free to show up at my door with coffee. Just don't expect me to invite you in. I have 3 kids, a dog, 2 cats, a husband who zones out with a book (when he's not sighing about granola bars), way too much junk of which I'm trying to dispose and a nice heaping case of malaise. Plus until just a few hours ago, it was Shabbat and G-d expressly said, "Dude, it's MY day. Step away from the mop!" Really, it's in there. Just bust out your copy of the Tanakh and you'll find it there. I promise.