Saturday, October 04, 2008

But the boobs get in the way.

I'm a big fan of altering random songs to better suit my needs (or odd sense of humor).

So lately, I've taken liberties with this little gem:

Just change the refrain to, "but the boobs get in the way."

I don't know how many sizes I've gone up during this pregnancy, but I know that DD bra I just got is a bit snug (DD is my usual nursing size).

At this point, I can still sleep on my stomach with some maneuvering, but damn it, the breasts are loudly protesting that position. My uterus can deal, but my breasts scream in pain. They can just shut the hell up, though 'cause I thoroughly enjoy sleeping on my stomach.

After my daughters were born, when they were still in the NICU, I got horribly excited when I realized I could once again lie on my stomach. Too bad I forgot about the whole surgical birth thing. I was fine in that position, but experienced excruciating pain when I tried to get back up. Dh worked nights and slept during the day, so my attempts to call for him were in vain. I wound up falling off the couch. Horrible pain and complete humiliation, those are two side effects of a c-section that no one ever warned me about.

Anyway, back to the boobs. My sister (who is under 5 feet tall and 90-some-odd pounds) went up to an H or an I while nursing. We used to laugh when we got those "Increase Your Bust Size" spam e-mails. I once suggested that we open one and follow the advice because then we could have our very own shelves right there under our chins and honestly, that could be very useful for a new mom.

I've always been larger during pregnancy than nursing, but I've never been quite this large this soon. Only time will tell where the boobage will take us.

Until then, I'll keep humming my own version of that little ditty under my breath. Feel free to join the conga line and sing along.

But the boobs get in the waaaaaaayyyyy.

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