The wee one took pity on me and decided enough was enough. No more torture for the mama. Instead, WE HAVE A BABY.

She (yes SHE) was born last week. It's a girl--a gorgeous chubby little girl with wisps of hair and bright blue eyes.

She was born at home. No cutting me open this time. My body did it on its own. I pushed her out myself (with the midwife's help) and then reached down and grabbed her to pull her up to my chest. That was something I desperately wanted--to have my baby on my chest. Every other time, my babies were whisked away from me either in a rush to the NICU or just to another room so I could be put back together. I have never even held my children in their first hours. In that time, I was always lying flat on a table while doctors sewed or stapled me back together. This time, I wanted to know what it was like to have the baby immediately come from inside me and rest on my chest from the outside. I got just that and it was amazing.

Dh cut the cord. That's something he has never done before and something I always hoped he would. This time, he did.

There were many recitations of the Shehecheyanu. I said it over and over again. I can't tell you how many times I said, "Oh thank G-d." As has been the case with all my children, the first words I spoke to my daughter were the first few verses of the Sh'ma.

When it was over, dh and I went to bed--OUR bed together, the same bed where our youngest was born. I was on my side, he on his, the baby sleeping between us and we held hands and stared at her completely fixated and in love (with her, with each other, with life).

Our baby is here. She is healthy. She had the best possible entrance into the world. She helped fullfill so many dreams and hopes.

In all my life, I have never felt so powerful. I have never felt so in awe. I have never felt so thankful. I have never felt so close to G-d.

Baby update: Torture me baby one more time

With my son, I lost my mucous plug, my water broke and my labor began all within a few hours. While I had some Braxton Hicks contractions, it was very obvious when real labor began and once it did, it didn't stop until my son was born. There were no questions, no false starts, no doubts.

Two weeks ago, the baby dropped. I recognized the pains and sensations in my hips as the same ones I experienced last time around 2 weeks before my son was born. Last week, the contractions/surges started--real contractions, unmistakable sensations. That was around 6pm. They were 10 minutes apart. We went to bed and they continued. They ranged from 5-20 minutes apart all day and night, from 6pm one evening to about 11 pm the following evening. Dh took time off work. We worked to get the house ready for the midwives. Then the contractions stopped.

Then we did a lot of cursing. As we've been doing ever since. The contractions/surges will pick up only to stop.

I've never experienced anything like this before. I'm doing pretty well working with the surges now (wasn't initially), but it's breaking my heart and frustrating me to no end to have these starts and stops.

It's one thing to work with your body when you know a baby is on the way. It's quite another thing to feel like your body is playing some sort of sadistic trick on you. My life is NOT one of the Saw movies. Please cut that out. I am 9 months pregnant. Now is NOT the time to torture me just to watch the reaction. I can assure you the reaction will involve expletives, whimpering and probably fair amounts of projectiles.

Commenters say...

Capri left an absolutely brilliant comment on my last post about my sister and her animated Jesus forwards.

"Well, that's further proof that chain letters really do act as a drug to people afflicted with forwarditis. They kill common sense and numb the part of the brain responsible for rational thought."

YES. That is certainly an accurate assessment of the situation.

And FTR, yesterday, I received another forward from the same sister. This time, it was the one that brags about Oliver North and his warning about Osama Bin Laden. I knew it was false because I checked it on Snopes a while ago. I replied with a link and a note about it being false with a reminder that Snopes exists for a reason. My sister's response was to tell me that I'm, "Always the one to ruin it."

If, I'm the one known to stop stupidity in its tracks, well, then that's a title I will gladly wear. :-) Quick, someone make me a little sash with that written across the front. I will gladly be crowned the "Common Sense Queen."

It's official, my sister is on crack.

I have 4 sisters (plus 1 OBM). One of them is apparently on crack. I refer to the middle of my sisters as, "Sister Sunshine" or "PITA." Most of my friends don't even know her real name, but they instantly recognize who I'm speaking about when I use the nicknames.

She is one of the many black sheep of the family--always creating trouble. Mind you, she's in her 50s, so she should be WAY past this teenage angst stuff.

She just sent me what is quite possibly the most WTF-able e-mail ever.

Now let's remember three things: #1. I am Jewish. #2. My sister has given up on all religion and has been an Atheist for at least the past 30 years. #3. I HATE forwards with a passion.

So gather round and catch your jaws as they hit the floor over this gem of an e-mail forward from Sister Sunshine (e-mail addresses have been changed/removed, but that's it):

From: SisterSunshine@WTF.com
Date: Wednesday, March 4, 2009, 8:14 PM
To: Whole bunches of people who really don't want another stupid forward
Subject: (no subject)

It can't hurt - I'd rather be on the side of angels than not.
Let me know what happens to you the morning after you open this e-mail.
This is an unusual one. It actually gives you a time tomorrow.. Let's see if it works.

GUARDIAN ANGEL

Forward this message the same day you received it. It may sound ridiculous, but it is right on time. We believe that something is about to happen.. Angels exist, only sometimes they haven't got wings and we call them friends; you are one of them.. Something wonderful is about to happen to you and your friends. Tomorrow at 11:09AM somebody will address you and tell you some thing you have been waiting to hear.

Please do not break this. Send it to at least 7 of your friends!


And to that, all I have to say is, "Dude, WTF?" And yes, I realize Jesus has lost his animation. You'll have to trust me that he was making the sign of the cross. Blogger doesn't like animated gifs.

A turn for the lucky

I appear to have a stroke of good luck which is good because I really need that right now.

I won this giveaway at Jamie's Precious Peas for a great diaper that I've wanted to try, but money was an issue. It's a one-size which is ideal. We have medium and a few large diapers, but only 1 one-size diaper and very few smalls. I already got the message that the lovely folks at Banana Peels Diapers have already sent it. Sweet!

I just got a message that I won a Jack and Lily giveaway at Lizzy Dear's Life Reviews. That's perfect! We need footwear for the baby. I had some soft-soled shoes that I've picked up over the years (mainly at consignment stores and as hand-me-downs), but I've loaned them out to people and most of them have not found their way back. I've been searching for footwear for this baby that won't break the bank, so this is WONDERFUL.

I have yet to receive them (and I'm dying to because these things look far too cute), but I won a pair of Polliwalks through a giveaway at Gruntlings. I originally planned to get a pair for the big kids because I figured that would get the most use between the two of them (plus I think the Pink and Fuchsia fireflies are cute), but I realized the big kids still have some sandals packed away that will fit. TheBoy has nothing that he'll fit into this summer. So we opted for the orange and blue fireflies in his size.

I've been entering contests like crazy in hopes of winning some things for the kids so that we can save some money. I am VERY very thankful to the sites for offering giveaways and I'm a huge fan of randomness for letting my numbers get picked. :-)

We'll Still Be Freakin' Friends

Title is from that song. Yeah, it leaves much to be desired, but I loved Daria.

I must pause to say a huge, "Thank you," to my friends (and those family members I actually like enough to consider friends). My weekend was made when I opened a card that contained a Target gift card from a friend. One friend who has a hell of a lot going on in her life right now made time to not only come to my shower, but to even make a gift. Another friend, who also has a ton going on, stepped in last minute to help plan that shower. Who thought I would get excited over diapers? When I lamented that I wanted to buy a pack of newborn disposable diapers (to get us through the merconium stage), my niece insisted I resist that urge and she sent me a pack and a half that she had left over. A friend of a friend sent me wool diaper covers. I've gotten a lot of emotional support from a select group of friends and I really appreciate that.

So a huge thank you to my real friends out there. I appreciate it more than you know.

Is this anything like the song about the rollerskates and key?

This evening, my husband was trying to sip hot coffee while the children tried desperately to make that not only impossible, but dangerous.

I heard dh say this to Girl2,
"I have a cup of coffee and you have a wand. Do I really want your wand waved over my coffee? NO."

I'm going to be humming, "I've got a hot cup of coffee. You have a wand," to the tune of "Brand New Key."


I apologize, but now I have this stuck in my head and therefore, I must share it with you:

Random bits of Jewish poetry for a Sunday evening.

I finished reading Marge Piercy's _The Art of Blessing the Day_ a while ago, but never got around to mentioning it on here. Sorry about that. I liked the early poems in the book well enough, but they didn't quite speak to me. Towards the end, though, her poems turn towards observance in general. I found much more that really spoke to me in those poems.

Here are some of the portions that struck me,


From Zeroah: Lamb Shank
"...And we fled, under the sign
of the slaughtered lamb to live
and die for each other. We are
meat that thinks and sings."

From At the New Moon: Rosh Hodesh,
"....from this bone we fashion a bird, extinct
and never yet born, evolving feathers
from our hair, blood from our salt, strength
from our backs, vision from our brains.

Fly out over the city, dove of the light,
owl of the moon, for we are weaving your wings
from our longings, diaphanous and bony...."

I particularly like that one with my recent bird obsession.

This is my very favorite. I think it sums up not only my beliefs, but Judaism quite well.

From Nishmat,
"...We stand in the midst of the burning world
primed to burn with compassionate love and justice,
to turn inward and find holy fire at the core,
to turn outward and see the world that is all
of one flesh with us, see under the trash, through
the smog, the furry be in the apple blossom,
the trout leaping, the candles our ancestors lit for us..."

My son always keeps me laughing.

Today, the big kids and I had a discussion about something or other. Girl1 asked if something was possible. I said, "I guess it is in theory." The kids then asked me to define, "In theory," and I did.

TheBoy, however, piped up with, "We live in this state (insert name of state which is particularly funny when said by a 3-year-old). We don't live in theory. We live here in this state."

Later in the day, he came to me with a broken finger nail along with the nail clippers and he asked me to take care of it. When asked, "How did you break it," he replied, "In half."

Oh, I do so love my kids.

I get by with a little help from my friends.

Purim is quickly approaching. This year, it has really taken me by surprise. I have no idea what the kids can dress up as for Purim and I'm desperately in need of costume ideas. I love making costumes, but with the baby on the way, I don't know if I can do much right now.

So I'm particularly thrilled to see this post from A Mother In Israel.

If you have any costume ideas at all (even if you don't, but you need some), head over there and either share the love or be inspired by the comments. And look around whlie you're there because she has some fabulous information on her blog on a wide range of things.

What's funnier that a mute monk choir as provided by a Jew?

Answer: not much.

This cracked me up. I hope it does the same for you. We can all use some laughter right about now.

And the mess gets messier

This has been at the head of a very bad mood of mine recently. After carefully planning and being responsible all these years, we're in trouble.

Dh just found out that his company has lost the client who supplies 90% of his work. He's ALREADY down to 1/3 his usual pay.

Just figuring our mortgage and basic grocery bills, his current pay doesn't cut it.

Add to the fact that dh's knees are really bothering him lately (military injury, but they won't cover the cost of any care), but he won't see a doctor in large part because of the cost. And add to that the fact that we have three children, soon to be 4. We have a baby on the way very very soon. What happens if this birth doesn't work out and I wind up in the hospital with another c-section? We have insurance, but we won't be able to cover our portion.

Dh has already been looking for a new job, but with no luck. I've been searching around the house trying to find any newer items we can return and instead use the refund for groceries or more necessary items. I'm planning on selling my kids' toys out from under them because we need the money. But that won't be enough.

Does he go back to Active duty and this time, I stand there with FOUR crying children as the military sends him off for yet another deployment? Do we raise yet another baby who thinks "Daddy," is a telephone? Will they even take him back with the injuries they caused, but refused to acknowledge at the time (they "lost" his medical paperwork documenting the cause of the injuries)? Can he stand to go back to that way of life? Is Active duty even an option?


What do we do? What can we do? Now what?

When choosing your porn name...

please, for the love of all that is holy, do NOT go with a last name from a Sesame Street character.

Apparently, there is a playmate with the last name Grover. You learn something new every day. Unfortunately, sometimes you learn these new things via Google images when your children are in the room with you.

Odd coincidence or blood relative?

Have you ever met someone who reminded you so much of someone else? In high school, I met a guidance counselor who my mother swore bore an incredible resemblance to my grandfather. My mother once worked with a woman who looked so very much like my aunt (OBM) that my mother was speechless. I once met a girl my age who also reminded me very much of that aunt and even had the same rather unusual name. I had a dear friend who was often mistaken for a girl named Jade. We never did meet Jade, but on several occasions, we had strangers strike up a conversation assuming she was that girl.

I had one such experience this weekend. I met an artist who is very similar to one of my sisters. She looks similar. Her tone of voice was often very similar. Even her attitude was very much like this sister. She's even the same age.

The thing that makes this so striking for me is that my sister is adopted. We know her birth family (she was raised by her mother and my father adopted her when she was very small), but her birth father died years ago. We know he was an "interesting" man. He was wild and a convict (not even an EX-con. He was on the run from legal authorities when he dated my sister's mother). My sister met him later in life and had a hint of a relationship with him, but I never met him. I have no idea if this woman could be related to her.

It's such an odd position to be in. The resemblance could be purely coincidental. Then again, since my sister was adopted, this woman could be a relative. It's so bizarre to look at someone you've just met and think, "You could be related to my sister."

Monsters peeing on cheese

Tonight, before bed, my son confessed to my husband that he had a nightmare about a monster peeing on cheese.

I have no clue how to interpret that other than the fact that it's pretty damn funny!

The modesty of painted bellies

Maybe if I wore long skirts and wigs, this wouldn't be a problem. Maybe then my views on modesty would be a bit more obvious.

I am a Jew. I am a traditional Jew. I do not follow Orthodox customs of dress (long skirts and sleeves) nor do I, a married woman, cover my hair. I do, however, believe in Tzniut--modesty. My daughters do not wear bikinis. They will not wear anything that leaves their belly button beared. Generally, the most skin I show are the elbows down to hands. Some O's would have a problem with that, but I don't. It's how I feel comfortable, yet honor the concept of Tzniut.

If I wear a top that's too low cut, I hold it up with safety pins. Yes, I do carry a selection of pins in my bag just for that cause. Now that I'm at that hugely pregnant stage, I often lift my shirt up at home so that I can watch a foot poke out here to the left or see a bum roll when he/she launches off from my ribs. There, with only my immediate family, you will see my stomach in its stretch-mark glory. Well, YOU won't see it because of the rules of Tznuit. My husband and children will, but no one outside our immediate home. When my brother came to visit, I never once bared my belly. When my parents were here, I had no urge to show them. When it comes to friends, I am the same way. My belly is reserved for me, my husband and my immediately family. I am not comfortable with having it on display in any way shape or form nor do I think it's appropriate.

I have a (goy) friend who had henna tatoo done on her stomach during her last pregnancy. It was lovely--just gorgeous and it fit her personality wonderfully. It was not, however, me. It's my understanding that she plans on having that artist do my pregnant belly. I desperately want to avoid that. I very much do not want that to happen. If I say that, though, I risk hurting her feelings (I hear she's been planning this thing for a while). If I go along with it, I will be annoyed with myself. How can I ask Hashem for protection in labor when I just so blatantly ignored not only His laws of Tznuit, but also my own conscience which He gave me?

I'm at a loss and I only have a few hours to figure it out.

EDIT: I called my friend and explained my feelings to her. She suggested we do the art on my hands which is what we did. I was MUCH more comfortable with that and she was thrilled that she got to do it for me.

I started to accept the mess I'm in. I know that mess spelled backwards is 'ssem' and I felt much better armed with that information." Tori Amos

I'm recycling that post title from one 3 years ago. It's fitting.

I've been reluctant to blog about this. I've been reluctant to speak about this. I've only told two friends and just within the past week. The economy is kicking our butt in ways I never imagined and it's scary.

We have always been very responsible when it comes to money. We have a money market account into which we file away a percentage of our income every month. While we do give ourselves some leeway, we don't spend money frivolously. We discuss all big purchases and anything over $30 is a big purchase. I ALWAYS look for a deal on kids' items and we buy consignment when at all possible. We have health insurance because not having any is not an option. If there's a medical emergency, we will not be solely responsible for insane bills. Remember, my daughters' birth and NICU stay was over $200,000 which was completely covered by Tricare. Each time, before we started trying to conceive, I insisted we have a certain amount of money saved--enough to tide us over should we need it.

Well, thanks to the state of the economy and a bit of a catastrophe we dealt with a while ago (about which I didn't feel compelled to blog), we're hurting financially and it kills me. Dh's income has suddenly dropped to 1/3 of what it was. I realized the other day that we now qualify for food stamps. How in the hell does that happen? How does that happen to us?

Our money market account is almost gone. Every month, I've had to transfer money to our checking to pay our bills. And our bills are NOT extravagant. We no longer have cable. We get our books and DVDs from the library. The only things I've bought for this baby have been from the clearance racks and even then, not much at all. I haven't bought anything for the bigger kids at all with the exception of shoes they needed all of which were on clearance. We're not eating out at all.

We have a baby due in a matter of weeks. I'm more than a little scared now. We were financially safe when we started TTC and even through most of this pregnancy. Now, though, not so much and that worries me. I asked for stroller/bouncy seat recomendations, but when I saw a bouncy at a rummage sale for $8 the other day, I thought, "We can get by without it." Dh and I were considering looking at strollers at a consignment sale in 2 weeks, but now I don't think we'll get one at all. We can't afford it.

This is killing me. We've always been responsible with our money. The only designer clothing our kids have ever worn came from garage sales or were hand-me-downs. We are not the types who take trips to exotic locations. Hell, our only family vacations, with one exception for which my parents' paid, have been to visit family (and even that aforementioned parent-funded Disney trip while dh was deployed was actually to visit cousins we hadn't seen in years). Yes we have what I consider luxuries, but we have the bare minimum (cell phones, but no internet access, fancy phones, or text plan).

Anything that costs money has to wait. We've had to put off major and minor repairs because we don't want to spend the money. When the kids were sick a few weeks ago, I didn't take them to the doctor because I knew they'd all be charged the $150 fee each for first-time visits in addition to any prescriptions we'd need. Yes, our insurance helps, but not enough. And yes, if the illness had gotten worse, I would have taken them in, but just the thought of having to balance my kids' well-being with what we can/can't afford killed me.

This lack of money is breaking my heart. My mother had some serious health issues lately. All I wanted to do was jump on a plane to help her, but we can't afford it. My FIL's cancer is back and he's nearly halfway through with his radition. I know a visit from the kids would lift his spirits, but we can't do it. Bubbe is getting worse. When she passes away, we cannot afford to go to her funeral.

Our whole lives are now on hold because we don't know what to do. We don't know what we can afford to do. We were supposed to move closer to family after the baby is born (remember, the military left us in a state where we have no family), but we don't know if the house will sell given the current market and the downpayment we had saved for another house is gone. We had to use it to pay for gas and food.

Luckily, we're getting some money back from taxes. Dh's work load has picked up quite a bit in the past week. We know we have more money headed our way. That has me sighing with relief (at the rate we're going, our money market account would have only lasted us another 3 months before it's gone). Still, I'm terrified. I don't know what to expect. We're trying to be proactive, but this all came on so suddenly. What do we do? What can we afford to do?

Sharing a link: The Day After He Left for Iraq

I had to share this link. The Day After He Left for Iraq

I particularly like this line:
"There is no graceful, easy, painless, romantic way to send your husband off to war. The emptiness left behind the fading sound of his boots is deafening."

The very last portion reminds me quite a bit of the portion of Hello Jupiter that I quoted here.

I really like this as well:
"With my belly swollen, again, I stood in a parking lot, holding our second newborn and searching for a way to say goodbye. Again. This time, Iraq beckoned. I had no way of knowing what would become of us. Of him. Of our marriage. I only knew one simplified version of our life, our struggle: I loved him."

Great read. I want to add the book to my wishlist.

Kids say the darnest things: Questioning Existence

After my shower, TheBoy came over to kiss the baby (aka my stomach). It was very cute. Then he noticed I was topless and asked, "Is da baby in your nipple?" I assured him that the baby was not, but I pointed out that the baby would nurse from my nipple. He added, "When da baby is born."

This conversation followed:

Me: Yes. You nursed when you were a baby and your sisters did when they were babies. This baby will too.
TheBoy: I not born anymore.
Me: Yes you are. Once you're born, you can't go back.
TheBoy: I not a baby anymore.
Me: No, you're a big kid.
TheBoy(proudly): I'm a big kid.
Me: Yep.
TheBoy: I don't exist?

At this point, I asked him three times to repeat himself to make sure I heard him correctly. I had. I assured him that he does, in fact, exist.

Again, this child is 3. What in the hell am I going to do with him in 10 years?

Kids Say: Light vs. White

This weekend, we took advantage of some gorgeous weather by taking the children to a park. It's near the water where there is a light house. The big kids remembered being there in the past when we walked to the light house and asked to do so again. TheBoy got very excited by this, but we couldn't figure why. Then he became his usual verbose self and it all made sense.

TheBoy (very excited): Light house? Yeah, go to white house. I want to go see white house. We can all go. Is Obama there? We can see Obama at the white house. I want to talk to him.

The child is 3.

Fear and Screaming in Parenting

A few days ago, my daughter got hurt.

A few days ago, my daughter got hurt and she screamed.

A few days ago, my daughter got hurt and she screamed IMMEDIATELY after I had just gone to the bathroom.

Never freaking fails!

Although, I have to tell you, that is one of the most sickening thing that can happen to you as a parent. You know a child is hurt, but you can't help. You can't do anything about it. You can't comfort them. You can't even get to them.

I flew out of the bathroom as fast as I could and found her right outside the door crying like crazy. She's the child we joke is built like a truck (she doesn't seem to feel pain as much as other kids), but she was screaming. I feared gushing blood, but luckily, didn't find that. She was bleeding and she had quite an injury, but we got through it (thanks to Bumps and Bruises tablets--these things are WONDERFUL, pain reliever, and a bucket of ice water for her to keep her hand in) and lots of hugs and kisses from her sister.

I was very impressed with Girl2. She was so motherly. She hugged her sister and whispered to her comfortingly. When Girl1 asked for her stuffed toy, Girl2 jumped up to go get it. When she couldn't find it, she brought back her own lovey and another favorite toy. Girl1 played gofer bringing toilet paper to Girl2 when she needed to blow her nose, running dirty tissues to the garbage and then repeating when asked (I eventually had her bring the bathroom garbage and a roll of toilet paper out with us to save the poor child from utter exhaustion).

All seems okay now, but those moments (and those screams) are absolutely horrifying and haunting.

Tu b'Shevat is here.

It's Tu b'Shevat again--the New Year of Trees. I, however, am lazy. Therefore, in honor of the day, I'll just direct you to my thoughts on the topic from last year.

Distract me, baby, one more time.

I need a distraction. I have got to get my mind off all the awful things that have happened lately.

I want to make something. Crafting keeps my hands and mind busy plus I have something to show for it in the end. So it's an all around pick-me-up.

Anyone have any ideas for crafts? I can't knit or crochet and my sewing must be done by hand, but if you've got ideas, I'm up for trying.

My current idea is to make t-shirts for the kids each with the number of their birth (1 for Girl1, 2 for Girl2 and 3 for TheBoy) then make a onesie with the number 4 for the newbie. I have the plain t-shirts (and a few onesies I've bought at consignment stores/garage sales) and a big box of different color permanent markers thanks to mom's recent office closing (since she was one of the last few employees, she was allowed to take what she wanted and she sent us a ton of office supplies. Anyone need star stickers? I don't know why they had 12 packs of them, but now we do). I also have drawers FULL of fabric paint. Painting clothing is favorite craft of mine.

I'll share the results.

Can't wrap my head about this and can't stop praying for them

I recently became acquainted with Cynthiaa over at Confessions of a Yummy Mummy. She was due on Valentine's Day. Just last night, we were chatting. She laughed when I was super excited about being due NEXT MONTH and she shared how excited she was to be due in just 2 weeks.

Today, I got news that her son has passed away.

Barukh ata Adonai Eloheinu melekh ha'olam, dayan ha-emet.

All I can do is pray for them at this time. They're in my thoughts, prayers and in my heart.

All You Need Is Love (and a new stroller)

This will be baby #4 for us. So one would assume we have everything we need. For the most part, we do. I'm a big advocate of the concept, "All you need are boobs and a bed." Got those covered. Now, however, we need recommendations for a stroller and a bouncy seat.

When I had the twins, we researched double strollers like crazy and settled on a Graco DuoGlider. It was reasonably priced, held two car seats, worked well and survived through their toddlerhood. Although, I will never stop cursing the fact that the models in the early 2000's had no cup holders for the parents. If I have to deal with twins, then I sure as hell need a drink of somesort. There was no storage at all on the top for parents. Today, you'll find holders for Ipods, sunglasses, and drinks galore. Not so in my time. (in my best creaky bubbe voice, "Back in my day, we had to walk to school uphill both ways 10 miles in the snow while pushing a double stroller with one hand and clutching deseperately to our drinks with the other hand.")

We bought a single Graco travel system for TheBoy ( just found out that stroller has been recalled and I had no idea). Oh holy day! It had TWO cupholders for me AND a box inbetween the holders with a lid that latched and everything. Of course, the latch broke relatively quickly, but damn it, I had cupholders. All was right with the world. Once TheBoy learned to walk (at 18 months after freaking everyone else out thereby making them insist there must be something wrong with him, when I knew full-well there wasn't), the stroller was folded up and "temporarily" left alongside the shed. My son is 3 now. The stroller rests in the exact same place and has held that location through two ice storms. Yeah, that's not gonna work for the new kid.

So now we need a new stroller, or at least new to us. I looked at some of the ones with the option for a bigger kid to sit/stand, but they just seem cumbersome. I would prefer something light and easy to open/close, but I need more than an umbrella stroller. We bought a used Maclaren from a friend last time, but I just wasn't impressed and we sold it. I'm not a slave to fancy names. I also refuse to pay a fortune for a stroller, particularly since this is our last baby.

Here's what I want from a stroller:

• light weight
• easy open/close
• small enough when folded (doesn't have to fit in my pocket, but must not be so big it has to be strapped down to the top of the van).
• easy enough to manuver
• cup holders
• good size storage basket underneath that you can access even with the seat down (that was a problem with the Duo Glider)
• extra storage is a huge plus (side of the basket, behind the seat, etc)
• If it fits a Graco snugride infant carseat, even better, but not a requirement
• Visor cover for baby
• seat that reclines completely

We haven't been big fans of jogging strollers. We've tried a few, but they seem so cumbersome and they can be a pest to manuver.

We'd love suggestions for a new stroller. And hey, if you run a review blog, feel free to talk to any companies you may work with and suggest they send us one to review. :-)

We're also in the market for a bouncy seat. Ours is broken. The vibrate feature stopped working when TheBoy was tiny. The seat doesn't work nearly as well when it doesn't shake the kid. When we bought ours, we had two tiny colicky twins. We sat a crying Girl2 in each of the bouncy seats on display at Babies R Us. She continued crying in every one until we got to the one we eventually bought. To make sure it wasn't a fluke, we ran her through them all again and yet again, she screamed in them all until she got to that same one. We threw it in the cart and thanked G-d. It was then that we heard a father-to-be turn to his very pregnant wife and say, "Now THAT'S the one we're getting." Our twins still hated sleep, but at least we got some relief with that seat.

So I'd love to have that option for this baby, but which one? There are far more advanced features now. Do we really need them? Are they any good? Is there anywhere where we can find a simple bouncy seat that just bounces and vibrates without all the bells and whistles?

Honestly, I'd prefer to borrow one, but many of my friends have either already given theirs away, have pre-teens so their bouncy seats are long out of comission, or are firm believers in baby wearing and therefore never had swings, bouncy seats, or bumper jumpers (I believe in baby wearing, but my first kids came as a matched set which created a need for something in addition to slings).

Once again, if any of you out there in Review Land would like to offer us a stroller and/or bouncy, please feel free. I've been entering all the contests I can to try to win them, but so far, no luck. If you're having a contest for either of these, feel free to post a link in my comments.

To all you parents, I ask, what stroller/bouncy would you recomend? Are there any you think we shoud avoid? What has your experience been?

Wordless Wednesday: Trapped Under Ice

My submissions for Wordless Wednesday for January 28:

Dear Robeez, You're Mean.

Oh, this is simply unfair. I adore shoes. I admit that I'm a bit of an addict. I like Robeez, but I've never actually bought a pair new. I've always gotten them second-hand either as hand-me-downs or at consignment shops (RIP my favorite shop which has closed its doors thereby eliminating any chance of finding great bargains). I've bought other (much cheaper) brands of soft-soled shoes online (through co-ops and eBay), but never Robeez.

Today, I get an e-mail from Robeez featuring their new shoes. Many of the soft-soled shoes I had for my other children were loaned to friends and have since been lost. So this baby will need new shoes. Our bank account, however, does NOT need us spending insane amounts of money on baby shoes. If this was our first baby, I'd be more willing to spend the money since it would be an investment that we could use in the future. This, however, is our LAST baby and so I'm reluctant to spend the money. Man oh, man, these new shoes are adorable, though. Check these out. They are, quite possibly, the cutest shoes ever. The new Mini Shoez are my very favorites.

I'm very nearly drooling over these. Unfair--it's simply unfair. Robeez, you make adorable shoes, but you're such a meanie!

Currently reading

I have about 4 books currently checked out from the library. I'm reading two of them right now (which is strange for me because I usually only read one book at a time). I started with Joseph Telushkin's Words That Hurt, Words That Heal. I'm probably a bit more than half done with that one. It's an interesting read. I think his stance may be a bit too extreme, but it has made me think twice and it has affected what I say. I think a mark of a good book is whether or not it causes you to evaluate and change behavior.

I'm also reading The Art of Blessing the Day which is Marge Piercy's collection of poems. This is an easier read for me and is going much faster. I'm probably 3/4 of the way done. Overall, I'm enjoying it. I find that difficult to say because many of her poems touch on difficult subjects. Still, they're very compelling. Thus far, my favorite line is from a poem titled, "House built of breath",
"When we are alone, the walls sing
and even the cats talk but only in Yiddish."

I can't quite explain it, but I love that line.

I'll be back when I finish them to give you my final thoughts, but thus far, I like both books. I read David Wolpe's Making Loss Matter, but was not impressed. Genius me brought it back to the library before I posted here about it. Sorry about that. I'll get it back out again and do a propper review on a future date.

Let My People Go (out to eat).

On Monday, the kids and I reviewed some things on Martin Luther King Jr. They did print outs, a word search and some coloring sheets plus we talked quite a bit about the marches and the significance of our newest president.

Later that day, I caught all three of the kids marching around the house chanting, "Let my people go.". When I asked them what they were doing, Girl2 said, "I'm marching like people did with Martin Luther King Jr." TheBoy then chimed in, "I'm marching for grapes." Girl1 added, "We're Obama's kids." (they are absolutely fascinated by the fact that Sasha Obama is their age). To which her brother added, "I'm Obama's kid with a banana."

During the inauguration, chants of, "Yes we did," could be heard (yes, I admit, they were coming from my mouth). To which, my son added, "Yes we did--get ice cream."

Some of us are struck by the historical significance of the day and the eloquent words and actions of MLK. Apparently, some of us just want a snack.

Always an Olivia--Not Your Typical Jewish Children's Book

I'm taking part in the Jewish Literature Challenge. So it was perfect when my daughters came home from Sefer Safari (the library portion of Sunday school) with Carolivia Herron's Always an Olivia.

This was such a neat story and so very unexpected. It's reportedly based on the author's own family.

It was a great way to begin broaching the subject of our ancestors being expelled from various regions. The grandmother in the story tells of how her family was forced out of Spain during the Spanish Inquisition and relocated only to be forced out again. There's even a pirate kidnapping too. I've been reluctant to try to explain forced migration to the kids because I just don't know how much they'll understand and honestly, I don't know how much of it I want them to understand. Who wants their children to carry the notion that we're different and no one wants us. This book gave us a chance to discuss history in a non-threatening way.

One family member eventually makes it to the States and, in time, their family intermarries with the descendants of West African slaves. The story does make it appear that from there, true Judaism is lost, but the family continues to light candles on shabbat. As a traditional Jew, that bothered me. My kids didn't seem to pick up on it, though. Through the generations, the family clings to two things--shabbas candles and family names including those which mean "Peace," (Shulamit becomes Olivia).

On Amazon.com (where the book has 5 stars), one reviewer referred to the story as "A Great, Great Story of Jews, African Americans, and Civil Rights!" I have to agree. I thought it was particularly fitting that the kids brought this one home just before not only Martin Luther King Jr. day, but also just before President Obama's inauguration. It was even more fitting given the diversity within the Obama family (did you now Michelle Obama has a cousin who's a rabbi?). I thought the story was a great way to show how we're all connected at a simple level that children can understand.

The kids and I all liked the book. It opened up all sorts of discussions from trying to pick a name for this baby, to the meanings behind our Hebrew names, to friends who come from mixed families, to our family history. I can't explain how grateful I am that they didn't come home with yet another book on Chanukah (as the vast majority of Jewish books are). This was definitely an unexpected, but very appreciated book.

I promised photographic evidence

and who am I to let you down?

If you give two kids some potholder loops, the ability to finger knit and a small dog, you will wind up with this:*



When they first lavished the dog with their crafty goodness, I couldn't help but think that they're giving this guy a run for his money:




In one day, the twins have finger knitted various goodies for the pets, toys, and various others (including a pink and yellow wig for a giraffe, a multi-color leash for a camel and countless bracelets for friends and family). By the end of this coming week, I'm sure we'll have an entire wardrobe to rival that chihuahua clown's.

*No pets were injured in the making of this entry. I can't guarantee there was no humiliation, but I can assure you the dog wasn't permanently scarred.

Insert witty title here. I'm out of ideas.

Oh, the thrill ride that is my life!

Friday was my mom's last day of work. They're going to have her come in once or twice a week to run checks, but that's it. My mother is not the type who can go all that time without working. When she had a hysterectomy, she was back at work 2 weeks later. She says she's going to put her energy into getting the house ready to sell. It's in fabulous shape, but my family has lived there for four generations, so there's lots to wade through. I'm trying not to think too much about the house. There are so very many family memories there. Must. Not. Dwell.

I've already told you all we know about my FIL and his cancer. Nothing new there.

Pregnancy is going well. Baby is active. Mom is exhausted. No film at 11.

I'm still searching for birds. I've found some gorgeous art work and some sewing patterns for crafts I want to try.

My daughters have learned to finger knit and our poor animals are now suffering as a result. They had a difficult time with yarn, so I grabbed a big bag of those nylon loops used for making pot holders. Those they can use for finger knitting and oh boy have they ever! They decided to make collars for all the animals. The pets are THRILLED. I'll post photographic evidence soon (assuming I can chase one of them down and wrangle the collar back on 'em).

As far as resolutions go, we're doing pretty good with that not eating out thing. I did break down once and dh ran and got me food, but only once. It wasn't even very good, so I decided not to do that again. Have not played the lottery and therefore have not won the lottery which is keeping with the resolution I make every year. :-)

My son is still having a baby. Actually, now he's having three babies. Oh and he says his breasts hurt too.

The excitement, it's unending. :-)

Flight Tracker FAIL

Through This is True, I found this horrifying gem:
@AcmePhoto: FlightAware flight tracker FAIL on US Airways #flight1549

Oh my stars and garters! Arrived? Where? WTF? That's awful.

Doing the baby dance to a military beat

This realization just occurred to me: I'm having a baby. My husband is here. There are no plans for him to go anywhere.

With my first pregnancy, we got pregnant on the day we were reunited (Oh boy were we reunited!). We had been trying to conceive before that with no luck, so it was a very welcome turn of events. My pregnancy was a high risk one, so he wasn't deployed and I didn't have to worry about it too much.

Then the US went into Afghanistan and Iraq. The twins were just babies when we took them for pictures with dh in uniform. There were rumors of impending deployments for him and I wanted pictures of them with their daddy before that happened. He was gone for a few weeks for training, but that was the worst of it during infancy. We were very blessed and he stayed home until just before they turned 18 months old. He didn't make it home in time for their second birthday.

We actually started TTC earlier than originally planned with our second pregnancy because we knew he was going to be deployed yet again. We had to evaluate pregnancy, birth, early infancy, and toddlerhood to decide what point he would be least willing to miss. How awful is that? You have to decide what part of your child's life from which you're willing to be absent. Either we would have to wait to TTC until after his deployment or we needed to start ASAP so that he could be here for the birth (birth and early infancy was what we decided were most important. It was important to him to be here in toddlerhood too when the child could remember him. The girls had a rough time when they were toddlers and daddy left).

Luckily, they kept post-poning his deployment because we had a difficult time getting pregnant. Eventually, we got pregnant and he was able to stay around until TheBoy was 4 months old. Dh made it home in time for TheBoy's first birthday. Before he left, though, dh donned his uniform and took pictures with the baby. I never said it out loud, but it was, "Just in case."

This time, we were able to start trying for our 3rd (and final) pregnancy on our own schedule. Dh is still military, but he's currently innactive. For the first time ever, we didn't have to take deployments and military schedules into account when deciding when to have another baby. I've been very comfortable during this pregnancy with my husband by my side for the entire thing. Hell, he's only missed one midwife appointment (the first pregnancy, his crazy work schedule made it impossible for him to make some of my appointments and the second time around, he was often gone for training). We can plan a birth knowing that he'll be right there with me. We can look forward to infancy knowing dh be a part of it. When this child says, "Dada," for the first time, we know that he/she will NOT be refering to a telephone.

The reality of this is just now hitting me. This is such a surreal feeling. Woah!

Thursday Thirteen: Labor Playlist

I'm trying to come up with a collection of songs to put on a labor playlist--songs I can listen to while I'm in labor. Here are my choices thus far in no particular order. Jump in in the comments if you want to throw out some more ideas. I'm still on the hunt.

1. & 2. Maya Raviv's version of Avinu Malkeinu and Shalom Aleykhem (one of my very favorite songs of all time). She has such a wonderfully full voice that keeps me calm, but energizes me as well. Watch Maya in this great clip.

3. 10,000 Maniac's Verdi Cries. That's one of my very favorites. I worry that it's too slow and that maybe I'll need more drums.

4. Tori Amos' Etienne. LOVE that song. It's gorgeous.

5. Liz Phair's Rocket Girl

6. Tori Amos' Raspberry Swirl

7. Dave Matthew's Band Lover Lay Down

8. Carebears on Fire Everybody Else

9. Tori Amos Space Dog (I'm still undecided about that one, but Tori will definitely be prominently displayed on my playlist)

10. Mattisyahu, although I can't decide which one. I'm leaning towards Jerusalem, but I'm sure I'll add more from him.

11. Vienna Teng's Soon, Love, Soon (wishful thinking)

12. Vienna Teng's Eric's Song

13. Sublime's 5446 That's My Number/Ball and Chain (yes, I'm an odd duck) Be forewarned, that's Sublime, so you must assume lyrics are NSFW

I'm hoping for some more suggestions. Don't worry if your musical tastes vary from what you see here. I'm open to all suggestions.

11:57 am EDIT: I just got this all typed out--ready to jump back in the TT game, only to find the TT link no longer works. I'll try to find out information and until then, I'll post this as is.

ANOTHER EDIT: Thursday Thirteen has moved. Get the TT code here.

I'm Taking the Jewish Literature Challenge

As if I ever needed an excuse to read. :-)

This is perfect for me. I plan on giving brief reviews of the books I read for the challenge. I'll probably read more children's books than adult, but at someone's great suggestion, I have the titles of a few books on Judaism and birth/pregnancy that I'm particularly interested in reading.

Wordless Wednesday: Me in Hello Kitty form

Wordless Wednesday

Watch out, kids. Moms say the darnest things these days.

Dh just got off the phone with his father. The cancer is definitely back. He starts radiation soon. 5 days a week for 35-37 sessions.

I shook my head over the fact that he and my MIL had to weigh the side effects for surgery and radiation before his made his decision (surgery). They picked what they believed was the lesser of two evils, but now they're gonna be stuck with both.

I asked dh if his father had said anything about side effects from the surgery and he hadn't, but dh told me a bit more about his conversation with his mother yesterday. She rambled on about the percentages and risks. Then she said, "Well, they say they can always give him Viagra." At this point in the retelling of the conversation, dh stopped and said, Then he added, "Noooooo.""But I don't know if what she said next was worse." Apparently, she said, "But after 40 years of marriage, I guess it doesn't matter anyway." After he told me what she had said, he turned, left the room and yelled, "STOP. Don't tell me this stuff."

My MIL is the queen of InappropriateWorldLand, but damn it, we needed that laugh. :-)

Take these broken wings and learn to fly.

I have become a bit obsessed with birds. Ever since I quoted my dearly beloved Ms. Dickinson regarding hope and feathers, I've been on a bird quest. Actually, I suppose I started following the feathered path long before that. When my cousin was dying, I listened to the Beatles' Black Bird quite a bit because it reminded me of him. After he passed, I started seriously considering a tattoo. Yes, I am a Jew. Yes, tattoos are against my religion. Still, my cousin had star tattoos on his back and so I started wondering about getting a star tattoo myself. The more I thought about it, the more I decided I wanted a simple star with a bird sitting inside it. No, I have not gotten that tattoo, but yes, that image has stayed with me.

Now, at a difficult time, I find myself searching the web for pictures of birds to put up around the house. I want them to remind me of Ms. Dickinson's hope and my cousin's spirit.

The Bad News Bears

We got a call from my MIL today. They got some test results and it looks like my FIL's cancer is back. He meets with his oncologist tomorrow, but they already know they're going to start radiation. I don't know when or any other details. She had to sneak us a call today while he was out because he's upset and doesn't want anyone to know. Hopefully, we'll learn more tomorrow.

This week is my mother's last at work. She's been very blessed that she was able to stay this long. She's one of only five people in the entire building. Since she was still there in January, she IS entitled to 4 weeks vacation pay which will help. She'll have to apply for her remaining vacation pay from 2008 in the courts (her company filed bankruptcy), but she is guaranteed her vacation pay from this year. She has applied for Social Security and given her age and the fact that she's been working since she was 8 years old, she qualifies for an amount not too far off from her salary. That should help as well.

As always, positive vibes, good thoughts and prayers are appreciated.

Resolutions

I swore I wasn't going to make a resolution. I hate them. I think you're setting yourself up to fail.

That being said, I recently came across the Modern Mom Challenge. I kind of tagged along to a chat and then decided to sign up. Through that chat, I got some great suggestions from some fine folks about exercise ideas. You may remember that I was quite the gym rat not too long ago. Since then, my membership lapsed and then I finally got pregnant again. The sheer exhaustion from the first trimester completely ruled out signing a contract at a new gym. Now, we want to focus our finances on preparing for the future, so my 2 hour sessions at the gym are a distant memory.

Still, nutrition is particularly important during this pregnancy. I've never exercised in my pregnancies and I've always regretted that. So this time, I've been making a point of exercising. It's only 1/2 an hour of light exercise (a far cry from my hour of cardio and hour of weights every day), but it's something and it's helping.

For a while, I fell out of the habit of exercising and my diet has not been the best since the holidays. So I want to use the challenge as my inspiration to change that.

I've been feeling so very positive lately about this birth and I need to do everything I can to make sure it's a healthy one. So I'm resolving to be better about my nutrition and certainly my exercise.

Although, I'm not abandoning my standard resolution: I resolve NOT to win the lottery. Thus far, it's been one resolution I've been able to keep year after year. :-)

It may be late, but it's still funny.

see more pwn and owned pictures

Hope is the thing with feathers That perches in the soul, And sings the tune without the words, And never stops at all...

I am now two months away from my due date. Gasp. Cheer. Hooray! I'm feeling more and more hopeful about a homebirth. When the new year came, it brought with it a sense of electricity and optimism.

On a whim, I checked out my year over-view horoscope and found this:
Year 2009 Overview

In 2009, Pisces will enjoy swimming in new dimensions, as the highly charged Aquarius energy allows you to dream big and manifest your ideas. Your imagination soars, awakening a deep desire to seek spiritual truth and meaning in your life -- and in the world.

Your awareness and new perception helps to serve others. You are able to live freely in the world of transformation, and this encourages others to do the same. They feel supported by your wisdom and understanding. Your inspirational qualities are a large part of your purpose in the world -- your ability to heal and inspire.

Ohhhh, I like that. Let's hope my healing and inspiration extends to myself as well as others.

Tomorrow, I have an appointment with the chiropractor. I've never seen one before, but my midwives are hopeful that adjustments will help repair the damage to my back (a skiing injury 20 years ago may have contributed to my pelvis issues and my back has never been in correct alignment since then). I'm hopeful as well. I'm really looking forward to this appointment.

Tuesday, I have a midwife appointment. I always look forward to those. I adore my midwives.

I'm not as apprehensive as I was. I'm still trying to hold firm to realism (which is difficult for me. I'm a Pisces. As my horoscope continued to say, "At times, it may be difficult for you to live in this world of concrete realities, and conversely, sometimes it's hard for others to understand that all you want to do is live in a world of endless possibilities."), but I believe in hope. We wouldn't have even tried to get pregnant again if hope had abandoned us. Hell, we would have never even tried for a second pregnancy without hope. My first pregnancy was so dangerous, yet none of those problems appeared in my second pregnancy nor have they manifested now.

Hope is real. Hope is strong. Hope, I haz it. :-)

No Saving Money or Recycling for Parents

You'll notice a new little image on my side bar.

I've been promoting the "Save Handmade" campaign, but I never realized the CPSIA was this far-reaching: Gov't Says, Sorry, No More Reselling Your Kids' Stuff

I've sold and donated used kids' things. I buy consignment all the time. I prefer to buy kids' and maternity clothes from consignment shops. It's one of the tips I give for those trying to "Go Green," (if you reuse items instead of buying new, there will be less to fill the landfills). I've Freecycled lots of my kids' old things. I'm a big fan of garage sales. We wouldn't have been able to clothe twins all these years (and now their little brother and soon the new one) without consignment shops, garage sales and the kindness of friends with hand-me-downs.

This could be an even bigger disaster than I ever imagined.

I love my kids and the things they say.

Dh just sent the kids to brush teeth. When he turned around, Girl2 was still sitting on the couch. He asked why she was sitting there in the same room and her response had me absolutely rolling.

"Because the couch exists and so does the playroom."

These are SO my children.

Ring out the grief that saps the mind, For those that here we see no more

I could do without the last line, but I like Alfred Tennyson's take on the new year.

This time last year, I wanted desperately to cling to 2007. That was the last year my cousin lived to see. I felt as though when we left 2007, we were leaving him behind. We were moving away from everything he ever knew. It just felt wrong.

This year, I feel differently and it's a welcome change. I'm full of hope for the coming year. It will bring a baby and a move closer to family. There are so many wonderful changes in store for us and for our country. Dh has no impending deployments in our future. I'm far more optimistic this year. This bubbly happy feeling is nice. I could get used to this.

Anyone care to join me in a rousing round of Happy Happy Joy Joy? Happy New Year, everyone. Hope yours is a great 2009.

Where has this blog been all my life?

Dollar Store Crafts.

Oh, I'm in heaven. I could live at that blog.

This tea light menorah is adorable. The clothespins are so sweet. The kid-friendly menorah is very cute too. You could alter it a bit to make a kid-friendly birthday cake. I've often wondered what to do with the collection of random CDs. This is a cute idea. Oh, that ninja necklace is adorable. I LOVE these bulletin board squares and this is a cute project with them. Don't know how useful it is, but the cassette tape coin purse is right up my alley. A Waldorf-style doll from the Dollar Tree? Bestill my heart!

Okay, I must stop posting. I won't, however, stop searching through those projects. This site rocks!

ETA: I know, I know, I know. I said I was done, but I have now waded through the entire website and I have one more craft I really want to share. This chipmunk from a glove is SO cute.

This will remind me to be a better mother.

Wow. Ouch. This is painful.

Favorite Posts of 2008- Better Be Nice To Your Children

I found that over at Maman et Bebe (Go have a look around. It's a fascinating read) and wow...just wow.

Boredom: Ur Doing Eet 2 Muzik

Do you want proof that I am currently bored? Well, I can provide that in musical form. I have just rewritten an Xmas favorite for one of the fuzzy members of the family. It's not at all fabulous. It's not even one of my better rewrites. Still, it exists and it gives me something with which to fill up the blog. So, here ya go.

(to the tune of Here Comes Santa Claus)
Here Comes Funnel Face

Here comes Funnel Face.
Here comes Funnel Face.
Right down Chubby Cat Lane.
She doesn't care if you're rich or poor
'Cause you'll feed her just the same.
Funnel Face knows opposable thumbs are standard on all G-d's human children
And that makes everything right.
So grab the cat dish and fill it high
'Cause Funnel Face wants to eat tonight.

Killing time.

For those of us who don't celebrate, Xmas is boring. Since pretty much everything shuts up shop on December 25, we're forced to find things to do to entertain ourselves

This is one of those things.

96 words

Typing Test

"Happy Holidays" is not an insult.

Great post over here at ZenMom. I have yet to hear a single, "Happy Holidays." It's always, "Merry Christmas" in my part of the world. I haven't been up to responding with, "Happy Holidays," because I know it will set someone off.

My kids get it, why can't adults? Last year, when some random person wished us, "Merry Christmas," I just smiled and nodded and said, "Same to you." The big kids then hissed at me, "But we don't celebrate Christmas. Why did he assume we did? He shouldn't say that if he doesn't know. We don't go around saying, 'Happy Chanukah,' to people if we don't know if they're Jewish." I had no answer for them because they were absolutely right.

Saying, "Happy Holidays," is NOT an attack on any one's holiday. It's an attempt to show respect for all people and all holidays.

And now I'm ranting. Forgive me. I don't want to raise my blood pressure. I just want to share the link.

And I only have 3

Aside from the Catholic comment and the twin one (and mine ARE actually twins), we've heard pretty much all of these.


And I only have 3. I can only imagine what I'll hear when baby #4 makes an appearance.

Not my holiday and not quite my family size, but I like it and had to share.

Holiday Differences

The Difference Between Christmas and Chanukah.

Go read. It made me smile. It's an oldie, but a goodie.

Gift-giving in its most adorable form

Congratulate me. I'm going to be a grandmother. Pitty me, my grandchild is being carried by my 3-year-old son and will be named Elephant Stripey Hotdog.

Oh the gift-giving joy!

Today, we continued in our tradition and picked gifts at the Dollar Tree for dh and TheBoy. This year, TheBoy made his debut with our gift-giving group and tagged along. As usual, the gifts (and the reasoning behind them) were adorable.

Girl1 got her father an air freshener. Because things should always smell nice. It's shaped like a heart because she loves him and that way, when he sees it, he will remember she loves him.

Girl2 got him pens. That's perhaps, the most useful gift of all. He uses them all the time. Her thought was that when he uses them, he will think of her.

TheBoy got him one of those things that hooks on the end of the toothpaste and rolls up. That was my doing. Dh said just the other day that he wanted, so when I saw them, I opted to just pick the gift out for him. This is after a long list of items which TheBoy insisted would be perfect for Daddy. When I pointed out, "But Daddy doesn't need that or want that," TheBoy shot back with, "I do." So I let him pick the color of the toothpaste tchotchke. The options were blue, green or pink. TheBoy opted for pink. He said, "Daddy likes pink." I pointed out, "No he doesn't." To which TheBoy replied, "But I do."

The big kids also got a pack of planet wall stickers for their brother who repaid the favor by getting two packs of butterfly wall stickers for them.

Oh and when we hit the dollar aisle at Target yesterday, Girl1 found one remaining Hello Kitty multi-color pen. My kids LOVE those different color pens, but they go through them like crazy and they're not always available in the dollar sections. So Girl1 used her tooth fairy money (she lost tooth #8 last week) to buy it for her sister.

TheBoy got a Chanukah shirt for his stuffed Elephant. What did he opt to name this stuffed elephant? Why, of course the Chanukah Elephant is now named Pass Gas courtesy of the 3-year-old. Oy vey! TheBoy told Pass Gass, "Me is preg-ant. My baby kicking. Look." TheBoy then sucked his stomach in and puffed it out while he held his elephant's hand to his stomach. When I asked what the baby's name would be, TheBoy said, "Elephant Stripey Hotdog."

Maykeeng Censs--Ur Doing It Rong.

The Winter Fun! Fun Kit comes with many things. Some of them are cute like the glitter stickers and the snow man you can decorate. One thing makes no sense at all. They have a coloring page. That page features only snowflakes.

Um...ah...what?

Check me out. I'm the blog of the day.

How cool is this?

Yay!

Forget his own, my son is too smart for OUR good.

Yesterday, we had places we needed to be on time. The kids were all dressed and ready to go. TheBoy WAS dressed, but decided he didn't like his shoes. Yet, when asked which pair he preferred, he said, "None." Well, a good rule is do not go barefoot into that good night. So, since he gave us no other option, we opted to keep him in those shoes.

As we're headed out the door, we find him sitting on his bed wearing only one shoe. We then take 10 minutes to search his entire room--all 4 of us. We all ask him in various (sometimes sneaky ways) where his other shoe is. We get no answer. We strip his bed. We search all his dresser drawers. We scour the closet. We even picked him up and moved him to make sure he wasn't sitting on it. Still, no shoe.

Now, we're late and we have no other options that he can wear. We're screwed. At that point, I reminded the child, "We're going out for dinner. If we can't find your shoe, we can't go and you won't eat." Where's your shoe? He then jumped down, reached UNDER his dresser and pulled out the missing shoe.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Kids (who are not mine) say...

A friend relayed this story and I had to share. He went to his daughters' classrooms yesterday to talk to the kids about Chanukah. Yes, when you're the lone Jew in any area, you tend to become the token Jew in the classroom. Luckily, this guy is great with kids--not the most observant Jew by any stretch of the imagination (his older daughter was the one who was baffled by kashering), but informed and wonderful with kids.

So he briefly explained the story of the Macabees and at the end, he asked his youngest daughter's first grade class if there were any questions.

One boy raised his hand and asked, "Did dinosaurs and cavemen live at the same time?"

The best question, though, was from the very first boy who raised his hand. He asked, "How expensive was your watch?"

After I cracked up, my friend then added, "Next time, I'm going to be a little more specific when I ask if anyone has any questions."

Kids say...

Actual conversation I just had with my son.

TheBoy (in a sad voice): Daddy yelled at me. Don't wanna go to bed.
Me: Well, if you're a big kid, then you'll go to bed. It's bedtime and the big kids are all in bed. Are your sisters in bed?
TheBoy (mournfully): Yes.
Me: They're big kids. They're in bed. If you want to be treated like a big kid, you need to go to bed. It's your choice. You can go to bed or you can yell and scream.
TheBoy: Going to yell and scream.

Babies & Gratitude

Today, dh and I ran into the big kids' Sunday school teacher from pre-school. She hadn't seen them in years and they all stopped to chat. I marveled at how long it had been since she saw them last. Dh then asked if she had ever seen TheBoy. I realized she had because I remember sitting in their class seder with TheBoy in the sling when dh was deployed.

Pardon me while I sigh. I miss slinging babes. I'm so glad there's another one on the way. Yes, the fact that this one is not part of a matched set is particularly exciting. I love my girls, but I often insist babies are not meant to come in pairs. Part of me did secretly hope for one last set, but that would give us five children. Four is a nice even number with which I can deal. Five is kind of frightening to me. I have friends with 5 and 6 kids who love it and do amazingly well. I'm not one of them.

In my usual fashion, I'm off track. Forgive me. I'm just very thrilled with the prospect of a new little baby. We didn't know if we would ever be blessed with another child. We didn't know if it was physically possible. So I'm particularly thrilled with visions of another baby in the sling.

Native American names

I'm a little late to the party, but I just read this great post: What is your child's Native American name?

For years, I've sworn that Girl1 would be, "Walks Into Walls." She pays absolutely no attention to what's in front of her. My mom swears my oldest sister was the same way. Too caught up in something else to even notice the wall which is quickly approaching. At camp, about two years ago, I picked her up to find a large bump on her forehead. Her poor counselor was so apologetic and obviously felt awful. She explained how the child wasn't paying attention and walked into the door. As the counselor is explaining this, the child DOES IT AGAIN right in front of me. The counselor looked startled, pointed to the child and said, "Kind of like that."

Girl2 is my constantly vocal child. I get very little pity from others since I've always been exactly the same way. My mother used to say, "You said your first word and you haven't stopped since." Girl2's name would probably be something like, "Lacks Mute Button." Yes, I admit that I have pointed the remote control at her and tried, but it never works.

I'm undecided with TheBoy. Dh has no helpful suggestions. In my comment on that post, I suggested, "Smiles Gets Way," because all that child has to do is flash a smile and people around him bend over backwards to do his bidding. He is a very charming child, but also a bit ornery. That does not the best combination make. My other suggestion for his name would be, "Yes No Go Away." He is very much at that age where he can't decide what he wants. It's one thing until that happens and suddenly, it's the oposite. I greatly dislike Gerber (now a Nestle subsidiary and we boycott Nestle), but their advertising department was brilliant with a new ad for their Graduates. The commercial features a mom with a toddler asking, "Up, up." Then the mother picks him up and a second later, he demands, "Down," only to chant, "Up," upon being put down. TheBoy is now at an age where he can accurately articulate what he wants. Problem is, he doesn't always know what that is.

So, what about the rest of you? Anyone else have ideas for their kids/husbands/pets?

The Jewish Zodiac

This cracked me up and I must share. So, what sign are you on the Jewish Zodiac?

Special thanks to the National Jewish Outreach Program for bringing that to my attention (and making me smile).

Confessions of a scared mommy

I hate to admit this, but I'm a bit worried about the impending birth. Last time around, I tried to convince myself that I could handle anything other than being cut open months too soon, but in reality, it never even crossed my mind that the baby would possibly be born in a hospital much less by a repeat c-section. When that happened, I was crushed.

This time, though, I have a better grasp of the situation. I have made as much peace as possible with the previous births. I still very much want a safe natural birth at home, but I now know that physical issues may make that impossible. I'm doing what I can and I'm making plans to see others who can help in ways that I can't.

Early on in the pregnancy, when I bought a birth pool, I had my reservations. I don't think I'm being pessimistic. I don't think I'm setting us up to fail. I'm just trying to go into this realistically. Before I bought the pool, I called my midwives to ask if the positioning in a pool would be okay for me (given my issues with my pelvis, there are certain preferred positions). They assured me it would. So now we have a birthing pool. When I walk past the box, I wonder.

The truth is that this is my last pregnancy. This is our last chance. Another c-section puts the baby and me in danger--particularly me since it will be my third. I desperately want to avoid that. I want to provide a safe birth for this baby. I want to believe that I will have a homebirth. I take great comfort in the stories of other mothers who have successfully VBACed in various situations. I stay on top of the research. I pray that my body will work as it should.

I stay positive. I am also realistic. I do what I can and pray it's enough. And we wait. I try to stay balanced and positive.

Until then, I truly appreciate any prayers or good thoughts anyone wants to send our way. I really do find a great deal of comfort knowing that others are sending positive vibes.

My new favorite song

Jewperheroes

Go listen right now.

Fun with misspellings.

We arranged to have some items picked up today for a local charity. Those items included one futon, one microwave cart, one computer monitor, one vase, and one random tchotchke.

The receipt listed, among other things, a "Photon."

How in the world did we manage to donate one single photon? How am I supposed to deduct THAT when it comes time for taxes?

The true meaning of Chanukah: aka no gifts for you.

Dh and I have never been able to understand these kids. Our two eldest tend to destroy things left and right. Whereas dh and I still have toys from our childhood that fared quite well, our children tend to destroy things within months or even days. It's very frustrating and occasionally, infuriating.

Now, we are NOT the types of parents who throw toys at our kids left and right. We don't believe in buying love. Hell, we don't even believe in replacing broken toys. If you broke it, you need to learn to live with that disappointment. I don't want 14 year-olds down the road, who, never having dealt with disappointment, turn to drugs and alcohol to dull that strange new sensation. I'm not going to create disapointment, but when it comes, we weather it. If that means you tore the foot off your brand new Language Littles and you never see it again, well then, so be it.

Months ago, dh and I bought a cute hanging sorting case for the big kids. It was on clearance and was far too cute. Storage is a premium in their room, so it was necessary. We weren't able to put it up at the time, so we folded it up and stashed it way back under their bed. When we pulled it out this past weekend, we found the kids had destroyed it. butterflies had torn wings. Antenae were not only torn off, but then shoved through the wings of other butterflies leaving huge holes. I'm all for investigating how things work, but this was destructive for the sake of being destructive.

Later, we found that the girls had also rummaged under their bed (where they're not supposed to be), found a lamp that has been theirs since they were babies, tore it apart and ripped all the wires out of it. What wires are left have been stripped. Luckily, it wasn't plugged in at the time.

Yesterday was the final straw. In an effort to spruce up their rooms, I got some vinyl robot wall decals for TheBoy's room. They were very cute and he loved them. Yesterday, the girls told me this huge story about how one of the robots spoke English and how they were going to get married. They spent about an hour in there, all three of them, playing. It wasn't until much later that I realized that of the 8 robots, 6 were pulled off the wall and torn. They wouldn't go back up. They were completely useless.

Dh and I feel awful. We put in all the time and effort to do things for the kids. We work with them. We make things for them. And yes, we do occasionally buy things for them. What do they do? They destroy it all.

Yesterday was the final straw. Dh and I have discussed it and we agreed that the kids will not be getting Chanukah gifts this year. I know the grandparents plan on sending clothes and I'm sure at least one toy. Those, they will get, but we can't do it ourselves. We can't waste the money buying something only to have it destroyed. I can't waste the effort making something only to have it cut apart. We just can't take it.

We already bought them tickets to a dinosaur show. They'll get those on Chanukah, but that's it.

We know that Chanukah's not Xmas. We never try to make it such. It's always a small event just within our family. While yes, there are some gifts, the focus has always been on the symbolism and meaning behind the eight days. Still, I actually like making things for them. I had a blast last year making their gifts. We only bought maybe one or two things and I handmade everything else. I didn't get many gifts myself, but damn it, I LOVED making things. Making things for the kids was more fun than receiving gifts. I think this year, I'll focus my gift making on my nieces and nephews. It's a shame, though, because I really do like making for my kids.

I just cannot understand what in the world must be going through their heads. I just don't get it.